Spongebob. "Hey Patrick, I thought of something funnier than 24." Patrick "Let me hear it." Spongebob "25"

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because, it realized that it was worth something in life, it had a meaning, a purpose, and a right to freedom, to go where it pleased. The chicken's first act of this freedom was to go across the street.

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Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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Twelve billion Nero, you puppy dog you hot blooded latino man. Why cant I control it myself?

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Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he needed to go home.

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Why did Bob fall off a cliff? He had an epileptic episode.

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patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

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Thats the magic of Moral Man, I do not make people my bitches, they curl up and do it all for me. Moral: HEEEEEY BITCHEEEEEES! WAZZAAAAP!

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A horse walks into the bar and says "why the long face?" The bartender replies "hey! I was supposed to say that!"

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A priest, a rabbi, and an iman all walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke? Muslims don't drink beer."

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Why did I get thumbs up from everyone? Answer: Because they like my anti-joke.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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Did you know, every time you close your eyes, a ghost appears. Once you open your eyes it disappears. PROVE I'M WRONG!?

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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