Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

What is a pirates favorite crime? Piracy, which is still a serious problem in today's society.

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was a worm on the other side. And the more pressing question is why do i watch a chicken in my free time

Sarah Palin's political campaign

what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

How did the boy fall off his bike? A fridge was thrown off him

What did the players of the all black NBA team say to the white rookie? "Congratulations for making it to the NBA! Your hard work and dedication has certainly paid off."

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, why the long face. The horse replies, neigh.

How many sheets did the Asian want on his bed? "You sheet on my bed I kill you!"

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

Why did the Asian ace the test? Because she had worked very diligently, taken copious notses, and studied fervently until she had a thorough mastery of the topic.

If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

roses are red violets are blue get out of my face before i kill you

EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

A white horse walks into a bar and orders a bitter. The bartender says "Hey, do you know we've got a drink named after you?" The horse says; "Eeek! A talking cow."

what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

Q: knok knok A: Im home

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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