Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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Micheal Jackson walks into a bar

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? That depends on a variety of factors.

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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A man walks into a doctors office He has AIDS

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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Two men walk into a bar. The third man ducks. The rest of the bar patrons are thoroughly confused.

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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whats the difference between kids and jewish people? kids come home from summer camp

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What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

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What do you get when you cross a moose with a crépe? A moose with a crépe up his nose. -ilikecrepes97

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lil billy wuz killed cuz of hiz relijuz beliefz

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roses are red violets are blue most poems rhyme but this one doesnt

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 20 years later he would gamble away his life savings and then go onto live a lonely and unfulfilled life.

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Your momma is so fat, she has her own gravitational pull.

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This guy went to the store because he needed potatoes. So he asked the clerk where the potatoes were at and she said "Isle fiveeeeeee!" So he went there and there were no potatoes ! hahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahhahahahahahhahahajhahahahahhahahhahahhahahahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahhahahhahahahahhaahhahahahahahahahahahhahaahhahahahahahahaahhahahahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahhahahahahahahhahahahahahahahahahahahhaahhahaahahahahahhhhahha

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What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

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Why did the middle-eastern man fly his plane into the Empire State Building? Because he was a bad pilot with an interest in American architecture.

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Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

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a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops