What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

What do you call a dog that has no legs? It doesn't matter because he will never come.

Justin Bieber

Alcoholic walks into a bar and then walks out because he promised his children and wife that he would straight out his life.

Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

Q: why did the dog fall down the stairs? A: Because I pushed him down.

Bird is the Word. Actually 'What" is the word.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

What color is Michael Jackson? Pale because he's dead.

How many babies does it take to cover a roof? Depends on how thinly you slice them.

What did the deaf man say to the blind man? Probably "Look out for that car," but since he has been deaf since the age of 7, his verbal skills are tenuous at best.

Wha do you call a couple with aids? 2 pepole who need immediate health treatment.

Why do dinosaurs have no friends? Because they are all dead

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

Knock knock Who's there Joe Aids who's?

What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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