A cat walks into a bar. He orders some beer. The bartender asks, why the sad face. The cat replies, "I got laid off"

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Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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Was in a coma, survived trough smoke and mirrors, and I had 3 separated sections of my order in order to test the efficiency of my words, united we are about 6.800.000 people. Excuse my anger below, I mean I was in a coma and ended up on some hard painkillers, and while I am still tapering down on a "totally medicinally safe" dosage of 20 mg valium its a bitch, even for a guy that enjoys a mild painkiller every now and then in order to focus. Excuse my excessive typing, its paincontrol vs the stress and all 64 side effects of valium. I am alive, and my followers know that, I do not mean to brag, but Neronism tends to end up fucked up when I am gone with people trying to live up to what only I can do apparently, so I decided it was time to mash the separate groups together... Btw, we live at point zero now, if you do not know where that is, I can inform you at later time. But be quick about it if you have more questions, we only chat on horsehead due the "discussed hours"

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? A read along book

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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Yo mama's so fat she got baptized in Sea World.

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Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

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your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

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A man walks into a bar, buys a pint of beer, talks to his friends for while and leaves.

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why'd the Chinese kid die how the hell should i now

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What's worse than this That :(

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Why are black men's genitals larger than white men's genitals. Black men's genitals are made up of more skin cells.

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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Why did the man eat his wife? He was a cannibal

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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