Whats the difference between wayne rooney and shrek? Well, one, shrek is fictional. Two if he was fictional,he is green. Wayne rooney is not green. Three wayne rooney plays for a football team, surely shrek has no idea what football is. The list goes on.

why did the man fall off his bike? someone threw an oven at him

What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

What do you call a man that likes to play baseball? A Baseball Player.

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

A guy watches TMJBtv on YouTube. He then shoots himself.

a duck wanted grapes. he didnt get any

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

What do you do if life gives you lemons? Whoa... where did these lemons come from?

A man asked a horse "Why such a long face?" The Horse replies "My entire family just died in a plane crash."

A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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