Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

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Why did the chiken cross the road? idk, i can't talk to chikens

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Billy Sup Billy, come on in!

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How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

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what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? A second one

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says "I forgot to store my nuts for winter now I am dead". Ha! It's funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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i hate non minorities!

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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Whats worse than one dead Baby in ten trash cans Getting raped by kobe

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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