How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a loaf of bread.

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Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

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What's worse than smelly feet? Smelly hands.

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when u cant say fuck say firetruck because it starts with f and it ends with uck ?firetruck?

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What did the Firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire.... - Let's go home.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a butcher's shop. The priest and the minister each by a pound of pork while the rabbi doesn't because one of the 613 Commandments is that a Jew shall not eat any animal with hooves.

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What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

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theres a straight guy, a gay guy ,and a jew the weird part is the straight guy hits on the jew and the gay guy which make the situation all akward.

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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What is better than a Beer? Two Beers.

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what's worse than the holocaust the man who thought of it

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What is the one thing you can never steal back? Your viginity.

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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You know what's good for shoulder pain? If you ice on for 20 minutes then off for 20 minutes repetitively three times a day

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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