Roses are Black, Violets are Black, I am Ray Charles

knock knock who's there Bob I don't know you Bob and if you don't get off my porch this minute i'm calling the authorities.

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A:I don't know i was asking you P.S. leave your answer in the comments below :D

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

Whats brown and rhyme's with "Snoop?" Dr. Dre

When ducks fly in a V formation do you know why one side is longer than the other? Because there are more ducks on that side.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

What is green, red, and goes 70 mph? A frog in a blender

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

why did the boy fall over? because he was hit by a fridge that fell out of the tree.

sky silverstein

Why couldn't Helen Keller read? Tree sap.

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

BTMG JOAN!"!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP OF THE MORNING FREE MEAT NO SANTA THIS YEAR BONE FOUNDATIONS MOUNTNORRIS WHY IS THAT BAG MOVING?????????? MR MO MOLESTOR SHIT STAINS VEGETABLE GUN OPERATION SBB OPERATION SBB (THE AFTERMATH) #SL #NSL TIN SCHACK SKI LIFT MILK STAINS NATHAN: 5 - SEATS: 0 GREEK LETTER STU THE SO

A magician was driving down the road and turned into a driveway...

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

Whats green? Mountain Dew.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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