One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

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Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

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what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

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what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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Why couldn't the Mexican man get a job? Because he was dead.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

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A man and his friend walk into a bar. The first man says "I'll have some H2O." The second man, quite thirsty, says "I would like some H2O too." The second man dies because the bartender is a serial killer and gave the man the hydrogen peroxide he ordered. The first man is killed with a shovel.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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What came first, the chicken or the egg? The chicken. The chicken always comes first, that's why the egg never comes at all.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead. why;d the banana fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

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knock knock who's there? Dave Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's alzheimers has progressed to the point where she no longer remembers him.

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How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

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How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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