What's white and can't climb trees? A fridge

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My dog barks when someones at the door.

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Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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Hello, can I order a cheeseburger?

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Did you know that if you write "Beatles" on a piece of paper, chop it up, put it in some cabbage soup, eat the soup, poop it out in a cup, and put the paper back together, it spells "Ringo <3 Arby's"?

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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I am back with more jokes! -Lets go Mets It is best to dislike this one

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Q:What is the difference between a Blonde and a Ginger? A: Hair Color

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8================D-------- (.Y.)

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Nazi jokes are not funny. ANNE FRANKly they're mean! See What i did there?

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Women's rights

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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What's green and has wheels? Grass I lied about the wheels

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What do you call 10 dead babies in a blender? A horrible, horrible child abuse incident.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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What is that smell? I don't know. I'm color blind.

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

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so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

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Why did the black man cross the road? To rape the girl on the other side.

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Q: Whats worse then a minor fender bender A: Dieing a long painful death by getting stabbed 27 times then getting hit by a car and laying on the side of the rode for 2 hours then you find out that your wife was cheating on you with her your own brouther

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What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

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There were two blondes going to California for the summer, they are about two hours into the flight and the pilot gets on the intercom and says we just lost an engine but it is all right we have three more but it will take us an hour longer. A half hour later he gets on the intercom again and says we just lost another engine but its all right we have two more it will take us another half hour though. One of the blondes says "If we lose the two last engines we will be up here all day"

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A man goes into a butcher shop and says, "I bet you 350 euro that you can't reach that bit of meat," indicating a cut of beef hanging above him. The butcher looks up and says, "No way." The man says, "Why not?" And the butcher answers, "I have a huge gambling addiction, after losing my family to it, this job is all I have left" The man leaves, ruing the silly bet he had placed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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