How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

Roses are cars, violets are rude, this poem makes no sense, neither do you

How do you make a man cry? you torture him

What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

What could be worse than a giant paint bubble? The Holocaust.

Who's the slut of the alphabet? C.

Knock knock ... Knock knock ... Little did the man knocking at the door know that the kid was told not to answer the door when he was home alone, so the kid was hiding

Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

whay did the monkey fall out of the tree? he was dead. why did the cat fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey.

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

What does shit smell like? Your maaaa

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

Why was Samantha crying? Because her hair got stuck in a fan.

What's worse than getting AIDS? shaking hands with a liberian doctor. Knock Knock Who's there? Ebola

Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems make sense. 5

Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

-Knock, knock. -Is it the pizza man? -No. -Then go away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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