Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted better pay.

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Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

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How do you make a plumber cry? I'm sorry but our princess is in another castle.

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A jew, a mexican, a priest, a polock, a rabbi, a black guy, a white guy, an alien, a rooster, a duck, a horse, a chicken, a carrot, a chinaman, a plumber, a blond, and a christian are all examples of descriptive nouns.

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What is Worst than having a cancer ? Having two cancer

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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Knock knock. Who's there? Schizophrenia.

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What did the little girl with cancer get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far

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Q: What did the horse say to the other horse? A: Nothing, Horses are incapable of making verbal communication therefore they cant speak to each other.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney? One is President, the other is not.

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12/23/2012

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Q. what did the hobo say to the rich guy A. nothing the hobo wa a mute

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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man:"gullible is written on the celling" boy looks up

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Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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why do jewish people have big noses? because air is free

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A mechanical wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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