If you have 5 bucks and Chuck Norris has 5 buck you both have 5 bucks

What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

Why was the new born on the orphanage's doorstep? He was an accident.

Why did Sarah fall of the swing? Because she was very careless and swung too high.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

what do you call a ginger......... billy and mickee.......

Why was Johnny sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

guess what the clown said to the kid... im a clown

What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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