What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because death was certain if it didn't.

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

Two cannibals are eating a clown one turns to the other and asks "does this taste funny to you?" The other cannibal says " yeah because the clown has been dead for weeks."

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

There once was a man from Nantucket. He lived a long, full life. Outside of Nantucket. But he visited occasionally.

why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

When life gives you lemons......you should be really scared because life shouldnt be giving you anything....espically lemons so if life offers you lemons you better run

What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

Why was the Muslim crying? Because his brother got hit by a bus.

What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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