What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

An irishman walks into a bar and drinks 6 pints of guiness. He then drives himself home and savagely beats his wife and children.

Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

What did the fork say to the spoon? To get to the other side.

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

Why couldn't the blonde count to 70? because 69 was a mouth full:)

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

what do you call a white man in a black neighborhood a minority

Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

- What's better than just sitting on a couch in a summerhouse with a bottle of wine and reading a good book? - An orgy.

What did the blond say to the other blond? "I like your shoes."

What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

A man went skydiving and tragically died.

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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