Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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Did you hear about that guy? He had a wonderful morning.

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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What happened when the lawyer went surfing? A shark came up and tore his leg off.

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW? A porcupine has it's pricks on the outside. A BMW doesn't have pricks on it's bodywork, for a multitude of reasons: - it would increase the coefficient of drag, causing an increase in fuel consumption - the pricks would fall foul of pedestrian safety regulations

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

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Where do you guys find all these jokes? Your mom's Vagina

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

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Your mama so fat she often lays awake at night wondering if you father is happy with their sex life. He isn't.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

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How do you know a black man's been in your backyard? If you throw a barbecue and your friends of African-American descent decide to bring cold cuts.

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What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

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What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

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what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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