Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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In my country we don't swim, we drown.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

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Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

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Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Q. Why can’t a Skeleton Lift Weights? A. He’s all bone & no muscle.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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knock knock who's there bang bang bang bang who where da cash at

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what is black and white and read all over? A penguin in a blender

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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Who does creatine? James Cornish

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What's brown and smells like shit? My boxers.

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so a man walks into a bar and Cancer

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Why did the black man drown? Because he grew up in a poor neighborhood, where no one had a pool, and so he never learned how to swim

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A man walks into a sofa. BANG

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops