what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer what did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that long.

why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

What is the difference between Acenaphthoquinone and Acetoguanamine? I don't know...

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead. Q2: Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2: It was nailed to the first one. Q3: Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3: Peer pressure.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Latvian, a Turk, a German, an Indian, several Americans (including a southerner [but certainly not a redneck!], a New Englander, and a Californian), an Argentinian, a Dane, an Australian, a Slovakian, an Egyptian, a Japanese, a Moroccan, a Frenchman, a New Zealander, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Guatemalan, a Colombian, a Pakistani, a Malaysian, a Croatian, a Uzbek, a Cypriot, a Pole, a Lithuanian, a Chinese, a Sri Lankan, a Lebanese, a Cayman Islander, a Ugandan, a Vietnamese, a Korean, a Uraguayan, a Czech, an Icelander, a Mexican, a Finn, a Honduran, a Panamanian, an Andorran, an Israeli, a Venezuelan, a Fijian, a Peruvian, an Estonian, a Brazilian, a Portuguese, a Liechtensteiner, a Mongolian, a Hungarian, a Canadian, a Moldovan, a Haitian, a Norfolk Islander, a Macedonian, a Bolivian, a Cook Islander, a Tajikistani, a Samoan, an Armenian, a Aruban, an Albanian, a Greenlander, a Micronesian, a Virgin Islander, a Georgian, a Bahamanian, a Belarusian, a Cuban, a Tongan, a Cambodian, a Qatari, an Azerbaijani, a Romanian, a Chilean, a Kyrgyzstani, a Jamaican, a Filipino, a Ukrainian, a Dutchman, a Taiwanese, an Ecuadorian, a Costa Rican, a Swede, a Bulgarian, a Serb, a Swiss, a Greek, a Belgian, a Singaporean, an Italian, a Norwegian and 47-53 Africans walk into a fine restaurant. Fortunately," said the snooty maître d', "we'll let you come in without a Thai.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had escaped from his farm and didn't understand the laws of jaywalking.

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

Why Cant michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he is dying of Parkinson's disease.

Why did a little kid's mom let go of his hand? John Wilks Booth shot her

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

A black man walks out of a store. He was carrying a receipt.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

I'm going to rewrite history. History.

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

what do you call an icy road? dangerous.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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