What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

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What did the Muslim say to the American? Hi

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? a horse

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How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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yo mama is so old, so old that she was given senior citizen discount at the restaurant.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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A man walks into an illegal brothel. He is a cop. He takes them back to the police station and questions them in a completely asexual manner.

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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Roses are red Violets are blue Ebola is present And so are u

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what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

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Q: Who visits the dyslexic boy on christmas A: Satan

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There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

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why did the chicken cross the street? so it could throw a fridge at you, you are very loud at night for some reason and you wake everyone up. the chicken then goes home to watch gay porn videos.

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What do 9 out of 10 people enjoy? Gangrape.

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An American, a Canadian, an Afro-American and a Jew walk in a bar. They all order their favorite drink and go look for potential partners with whom they'd wish to engage in sexual relationships.

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What did the apple say to the carrot? Nothing, apples don't talk

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What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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