Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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What animal was two legs and bleeds a lot? half a dog

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

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Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

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Why are there only 50 states in the U.S.A The US gives territories a chance to vote if they want to be states in the US.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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A man walks into a bar He orders a beer, drinks the beer, then leaves.

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www.xnxx.com

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Yo mamas so tan she might get skin cancer

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If all ziggles are zaggles and all zaggles are zumbles, then why is your mother a whore?

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Knock, knock. Who's there? George. George who? Oh sorry, I thought this was number 52. my mistake.

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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