Why did the chicken cross the road? How the hell should I know? I'm not a chicken :/

Why did the boy cry? Because he was a crybaby

If I earned a dollar for every time you've said, "I'm too old for this sh*t," I wouldn't have made very much money. You are a giraffe.

Whats green? Mountain Dew.

I like my women like bacon. Greasy and full of wrinkels

Whats the differnce between love and herpies Herpies last forever

Whats funnier than 1 dead baby? 2 Dead babies

A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

Yo Momma So Fat!

Q: What did the black man say to his Ex wife after she placed a restraining order on him? A: nothing, he was no longer allowed contact with her of any kind and thus could not converse with her

Why did the Muslim man burn the American flag? The flag had touched the ground, which, by tradition, means it has to be disposed. And the proper way of disposing it is by burning.

What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The family performs an array of disgusting sexual acts. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "It has no name."

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

how do you make a clown sad? you push it off a swing.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

That akward moment when you tell a person you like them and they don't respond.

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

What did the therapist say to the other therapist? Your skin looks dry, let me lend you some ointment.

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

knock knock Goodbye

What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

Get a life besides thumbing down statements telling you advice.........

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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