How can you tell if someone is vegan? -they'll tell you

Knock Knock? Who's there? EMS - your pregnant wife died it a car crash

What would a gay man do with a jelly doughnut? Thoroughly enjoy its fruity taste.

How do you get a blonde to stop talking? Hit her in the head with a brick.

What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken.

How do you make a lumberjack cry? By murdering his family.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Reality TV.

Why did the paperboy fall off his bike? I threw a fridge at him because he was a ginger.

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

"Would you like to see our stool samples?" asked the salesman. 10 minutes later, I left with 3 new bar stools.

How do you rape someone? No, its a question. I don't know the best way to go about this.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

jack and jill went up the hill to get a bucket of water. jack fell down and broke his ankle and neck severely. jack and jill were taken away from their parents by child services, and their parents are charged for child endangerment and child labor.

the WNBA.

A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question.

A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

A white man got injected by Heroin at a party and got instantly addicted.

What's invisible and smells like carrots? An invisible carrot!

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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