What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

What's big, black, and girls love to ride on? A horse

A black man is trapped inside a bottle, how does he get out? He doesn't it is simply impossible for a human to get trapped inside a bottle.

How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? No neither have I

What did the magician's assistant say after the magician cut her in half?... Nothing. Her spine was severed and she died instantly.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

Did you hear about the Mexican boy scout that helped that old lady cross the border.

1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

My neighour knocked on my door at 2.30am last night, can u believe it? 2.30am? How rude I thought. Luckily I was still up, playing drums.

What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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