A mermaid found a magic lamp at the bottom of the ocean. She rubbed it and a cat with 9 lives came out so he didn't drown.

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

Why did Jim get hit by a train? Because he was standing in the tracks.

Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

what did one paper football say to the other? did you get flicked off too.

What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

how do you rube out a circle? don't draw one

A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

How many Jews can you fit in the car? 4 in the seats and 6 million in the ashtray.

Why'd the kid stick ice up his nose? To keep his lunch cold.

Why didn't the black man go to work? He had to attend his sister's funeral, who just recently passed away after her long hard battle with breast cancer.

A man goes in to a town on Friday, stays there for 3 days, and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? He's lying,

A guy walks into a bar

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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