whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

thumb_up thumb_down

A: Rock! B:Paper! C: Siccorz! D: Shoot! D: Jimmy, you alright buddy? I didn't mean for that bullet to hit you man..

thumb_up thumb_down

what does a buttler put in a closet ? stuff.

thumb_up thumb_down

Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the fat man do? He fell over...

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

thumb_up thumb_down

Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

thumb_up thumb_down

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

thumb_up thumb_down

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

thumb_up thumb_down

Jack just got his new yellow bicycle. His dad got it for his 12th anniversary. Jack was ecstatic to ride it down his street for the first time. He immediately called his friends Paul and Erick and went for his first ride. The neighbors were in AWE when they saw Jack taking off on his new ride. That day the three friends had one of the best day of their young lives, they went up to the lake, had some peanut ice cream and made fun of Alexia. Jack was in love with his new bike and euphoric that they were reunited and did all their favorite things with an incredible amount of passion. Erick hated his new bike.

thumb_up thumb_down

What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

thumb_up thumb_down

I have a little dog. She likes being tossed high into the air. I need a new little dog as the last one was caught by a gust carrying here over the sound-dividing highway wall and dropped into traffic.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

thumb_up thumb_down

Q. What did the chicken do when it lost its egg? A. It went to go look for it. Q. Why was the chicken scared of the duck? A. Because it was chicken Q.Why can't chickens fly? A. Because they don't want to Q.Why can't chickens swim? A. Because they don't want to Q. Whey do chickens cluck? A. Because they want to Q. Why did the chicken jump on top of a car? A. Because it knows how Q. Why doesn't a chicken have hands? A. Because it's not human Q. What did the chicken dream about? A. Chicken dreams Q. Why was the chicken lost? A. Because it wasn't found Q. Why wasn't the chicken afriad of the dog? A. Because the chicken was blind Q. Why doesn't the chicken know how to drive a car A. Because they don't need to

thumb_up thumb_down

What did the blind man say when you asked hi his favorite color? Nothing he is death too

thumb_up thumb_down

Knock Knock. Who's there? Barack Obama. Ok, come on in Mr. President!

thumb_up thumb_down

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

thumb_up thumb_down

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he's usually in a good mood.

thumb_up thumb_down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops