Why was the man lying under a sheet. Because he was dead.

What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

what do you call a sexy feminist? nothing, there are none

One day, I was talking to a lamp on the phone, when I realized I had called the wrong lamp.

An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

The child was fired from his job.

What happened after the man with no arms and legs lost his keys? Nothing. He won't get them for the rest of his life.

Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

Yo momma so ugly, she makes french people say "you are ugly" in whatever language they speak.

there once was a frog with no leggs

what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

A stoner walks into a bar. A few minutes later he is asked to leave by the bartender because he is disruptive and uncoordinated. The stoner leaves because conflict is not in his nature.

What is green, walks on four legs, and is capable of the strongest bite in the world? An alligator.

My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

How do you piss off a redneck? You wait until he is done fucking his sister and then you steal his truck.

Why did the man scream? He got shot in the eye with a nail gun.

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

Did you know that Hellen Keller had an amusement park in her backyard? Neither did she.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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