If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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Knock Knock Come in

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why did the black guy die? cancer

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A girl asks a Croatian bartender for a beer, the bartender replies, 'There is no beer in this bar.'

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Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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A blind man walks into a bar. Another man asks him if hes ever seen the new movie that came out. he then replies, "i heard it" then curled up into a ball and cries for several hours.

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What makes Amish bread different than regular bread? It's made by Amish people

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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whats red and green and has 8 wheels. a stick

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Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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What's brown and liquidy? Brown paint.

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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Gullible is not in the dictionary Yes it is

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because Macy's was having a giant sale.

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Knock knock who's there?... a stupid punchline because the door is imaginary and I am just wasting your time telling a knock knock joke

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To mama's so fat that her escape velocity in her surface exceeds 3*10^8 m/s

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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