Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. 97

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Q: What Did Alakazam Use To Listen Gangnam Style? A: He Used Psybeam.

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How can you make a Russian happy? Giving him two tickets for him and his wife to Disneyworld.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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This blind man read my mind the other day. I swear, it's like he has a 5th sense!

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How do you confuse a blonde? You put her in a round room and tell her to find the corner.

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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Whats the diffetance between a river and a waterfall? One is vertical!??

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Q: Whats A Schoolbus Full Of Black Children??? A: A Rotten Banana!!!

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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Guess what. Butts. www.youtube.com/c/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

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angelo snyder is not ga

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What is the french word for penis? I cannot say because I do not possess an adequate knowledge of the language.

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How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

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Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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A witch walks into a bar and orders a drink. She gets her drink and proceeds to have a great time.

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ASUS Live Update has stopped working.

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what did the cashier do when a Mexican robbed the store? call the police

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why did the boy loose his job.... because he was only 14,dont know how he got it in the first place Chuckles

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops