how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he wanted to prove he wasn't chicken

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roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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What do you do with a wombat? Allow it to freely express instinctive behaviour in its natural habitat.

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Why did the black man walk into the catholic church? He was catholic.

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What do lawyers and sharks have in common? They both play vital roles in their own society or ecosystem.

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A man walks into a bar hes later assassinated and mourned by his family.

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my name is piare (peeair) because my balder is empty

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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What would you call Martin Luther King Jr. If he was alive today? Alive

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

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knock knock whos there i dont know. go look

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Why did lil' Jenny fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops