What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

Predators face looks like what? Pussy.

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

cory

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

Patient: Doctor, it hurts when I run, I might have arthritis. Doctor: Let me check.... 5 minutes later... Doctor: It turs out you have 3 bullets in your legs. Patient: Ohhh, I get it now.

guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

Your mother has cupcakes, she offers you one, how many does she have left? The same amount she had before, you are full. Moral: Cupcakes.

why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

"I have a job perfromance review today!" Earl told his wife. "Good luck, I will make you a special dinner tonight," Melinda, his wife, responded.

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS ROAD?!!! cause he was silly

Q. Why did little suzy fall off her swing? A. She dosen`t have any arms. Knock knock. Whos there? Not Suzy.

Why were 50 police officers in the supermarket? A tsunami had struck and they were cleaning out hundreds of bodies

Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

A man walks into a bar, drinks, then leaves the bar.

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

Why did single women didn't want any babies for? because of Ice Ice Baby.

mario squashes another goomba when his wife hears of this he kills her 3 children with a gun and hangs herself.

Q: Why couldn't the skeleton go to the party A: He had a boner

A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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