Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

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What's the difference between Christians and Jews? The Holocaust. The Holocaust is the difference.

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What did the doctor say to the seriously ill patient? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What did the homeless kid get for Christmas? Hypothermia.

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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whats black, white, and red all over? your mum

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Why didn't the dog come to his master when it was called? It didn't have any legs.

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what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

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How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

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why did the man choke at the lunch table. Police there is a banana attacking me what should I do?

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What's faster than a black man running with a VCR? His son with the receipt of purchase as they realize VCR's are clearly outdated and must be returned right away.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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A muslim, a jew, and a black man jump off a cliff. Who hits the ground first? They all hit the ground at the same time because gravity pulls all objects at the same rate regardless of their mass.

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Adam Claypool is a fag. and his mother sweats my cum. Now that we got that out of the way lets get to the jokes.

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what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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How did the fireman get the cat out the tree? He sprayed it with a hose, killing it in the process.

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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what's bloody and sweet? A squashed mosquito sprinkled with sugar.

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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Why cant African children read? While there are many contributing factors the largest would probably be the lack of a standardized education system mainly due to the logistical factors involved in reaching so many wide spread communities. Also the current economic climate and general disregard for civilians by the governments in these area would suggest that the states' focus would be on other issues besides the welfare of their citizens, this is probably similar to other countries in similar situations such as middle eastern, eastern european, and latin and south america. Then again, not really being educated on this issue in almost any way, has probably contributed to a broad generalization, and so the premise of this joke is most likely flawed in any case.

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What happens when you drop a glass of milk? It hits the ground and breaks, depending on what material the glass is made of, acrylic glass or plastic, and the softness of the floor you drop it on,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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