Q why was John bullied A Becuase he told kids that bullying was a bad and serious problem to get them to stop bullying jimmy unfortunately Jimmy killed himself because he was bullied to much and didn't want to live.

Whats long and black and goes around corners? The unemployment line.

A jew walks into a bar. The bartender says we dont sell juice here. The jew promptly leaves, offended.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

two elephants in a bathtub Elephant 1: pass me the soap Elephant 2: no, radio!

Why did the 16 year old black kid drop out of high school? He started a successful small business selling mixtapes.

Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

What did one Black college student say to another? What is your major?

Person A: Knock Knock Person B: Who's there? Person A: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest. Open the door. Person B: It's the police, we have a warrant for your arrest, open the door wh-- Suddenly the door is smashed open. Tear gas grenades are rolled in, temporarily blinding Person B. He is then dragged out of his apartment by nine federal agents who proceed to beat him and throw him into the back of an FBI van.

Strength of body Vs Strengh of Mind. Mind: You can lead a horse to water... Strength: Then you can force that mother*bleep* to drink all you want that *bleep* to drink! Strength of body wins, horseless victory.

Yo mamma's so fat she has her own zip code!!! :) Well... the actual reason is she is filthy rich and her house is so big that it takes up a bunch of room, and now that im talking about her i really wanna be her even though shes fat!

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

knock knock. who's there? interrupting cow. interrupting cow wh... You mom's a whore.

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

-What do you call a dog with no legs? -Call it whatever you want, it's not coming!

Where did grandpa go for his birthday The morgue.

Why can't you teach drivers ed and sex ed at the same time in Iraq? The camel would get tired.

Why did the man apologize to the other man, after he had hit him with an axe? He didn't. The man was dead.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

How do you get a tissue to dance. You don't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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