Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

Why was the prostitute unsuccessful? because she had no vagina

Whats worse than getting a parking ticket? The Bubonic Plague

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Not to a blind guy.

What happened to the man who went to a strip bar? What happens to all of us. He died.

A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

Roses are red, yup.

I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

What happens when you Shoot a guy with a red Shirt On? He Dies.

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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