What's worse than falling in the mud whilst wearing a suit? Burying your parents.

What's more irritating than a half eaten apple? Some prick taking up half the page with shitty copy and past routine.

why did the chicken cross the road? he saw a rather desperate looking homeless person coming towards him, and, realizing he had no change, figured it was the best way to avoid an awkward situation.

When I meet the woman of my dreams, she wont know what hit her... Nor will the police.

Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

What do you get when you mix red and yellow together? rellow

Why didn't he finish his

Sidney Crosby walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar like a pole so he gets another concussion.

a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

an object in motion continues to stay in motion unless acted upon by an external force :)

Q:What's the difference between a Boy scout and a Jew? A:Boy scouts come back from camp.

Why didn't Joe want to stand up? Because he had no legs!

How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a bmw? I don't have a bmw in my garage.

A man asks his friend "what's black, blue, and red all over?" He repiles, "Nothing, because I'm colorblind."

What did the little boy ask for for Christmas? A new brain, as he has a malignant tumor, he died.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

Hitler: A jew walked into a bar... jokes, it was a gas chamber

1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

guy walks into a bar, ouch

A cat playing laser tag.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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