Knock Knock Who's there? 9/11

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Why did the overweight black man wake up & then not get out of bed? He was paraplegic.

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A Norwegian, a Swede and a Dane where having a bet on who could swim the furthest without getting wet on their hair. The Swede could have done better... The Dane did surprisingly well. The Norwegian, being bald, was disqualified. Moral: I still have some hair left!

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wife: why are women's feet smaller husband: so they can stand closer to the kitchen sink

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Charles Grodin. Charles Grodin who? Exactly.

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Your mother is so fat that occasionally she'll have more than one serving of preserves on her toast in the morning

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What did the orange say to the apple? “To be sentient is truly unbearable without sexual organs.”

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"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

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it was christmas and the kid waited all night. finally santa came.....

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Laughter is the best medicine. No, Heroin is.

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BAr intO a wAlks… sorry I wrote that joke after walking out of a bar.

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why is caleb mears sucha perv? becasuee its calebbbb ahahahahahahah

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Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

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knock knock come in !

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What do 9 out of every 10 people enjoy? Gang rape.

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The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

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Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

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.Ttwo guys walked into a bar. The third one ducked.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

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An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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