How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

Q: What do you call 500 lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A: A Good Start.

What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

What is the difference between a bright red Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

What do you call someone without legs or arms laying at your front door? Steve

Q: How do you catch a squirrel? A: Throw a fridge at it

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

whats worse than a friend asking you if their ugly, telling them to look in the mirror.

knock knock go away!!!

What do the snake and the bird have in common? They can both fly, except for the snake...

http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The driver was a loaf of bread

a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

Why did sally drop her drink? Because she was hit by a bus. Knock Knock. "whos there?" Not sally.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

A man is sitting on his couch. The lights go out and his TV begins to float away. He breaks down into tears believing he has been cursed for a crime he commited earlier.

What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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