what do u call a dumbass phone cia cias phone

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

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Why did the dog chase the cat. Cause he was fking hungry

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a horse walks into the bar. the bartender asks why the long face.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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Spot the mistake: a) x+2= 5 => x=3. b You.

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two men are standing on a roof. Man #1: do you want me to push you off a roof? Man #2: No.

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A mexican fast food worker accidentally drops a cheeseburger on the ground. Realizing the floor is most likely unsanitary, he throws it out and gets the customer a new one.

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Sixty... eight

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jim. Oh, come in Jim!

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What did the Asian father say to his son when he got a b? Good job son!

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Niether has he

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Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

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What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

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a black guy a white guy and a spanish guy walk into a bar, after they left the bar they became good friends despite thier differences.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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Why did the rapper carry an umbrella? Because it was raining.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Haiku doesn't rhyme, And neither does this

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What do your friends have in common with a tree? They both fall down when you hit them multiple time with an axe

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What did the bar say to the man? Nothing, bars can't talk

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Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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