How do you fit 500 babies into a phone booth? With a blender. How do you get them out? Nachos (make a dipping and snacking motion).

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What's small, white, and it killed Bruce Lee? Aspirin.

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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What do retards eat for lunch? Grilled Cheese

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The blonde, brunette and,the red headed girls were at a store. When the blonde says......... im tired let's leave.

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Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

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You know what's worse than having friends with a lake houses Not being invited to their lake house...

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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How much does a dead battery cost? Nothing, it's free of charge.

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why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

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What's worst than your favorite football team losing the football? Giving birth to a stillborn child.

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Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

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This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

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How do you make a baby cry? You kill its mother.

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What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

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A baby seal walks into a club. The man holding the club skins him and makes a lot of money.

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a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

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How do you cure cancer? do i look like NASA?

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What is a haiku? Are they hard to come up with? Obviously not.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, That's okay, I'm not colourblind.

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Why did the squirrel across the river upside down? So it could keep its nuts dry.

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops