You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

Knock, knock. Come in.

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

Why is Obama Care a lie? Cuz he doesn't care!

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

What do you call a man who only eats fast food? Unhealthy.

Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

stinky boner

whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

Why did the Jewish cross the road? He didn't he died in Holocaust.

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

Whats Barack Obama's favorite number ? 7

Q: What happens when eight men throw purple at a rain coat? A: Mud-flaps, because electricity can't power a vagina.

Three men are walking on a beach when they find a lamp. They rub it, and a genie comes out. It tells them that they each get one wish, and to choose wisely. They each decide to discuss what to wish for with their wives. Their wives take them to a local hospital, where they receive treatment for hallucinations.

So a little girl walked into a bar... A concerned adult then told the bartender. The bartender's name was Jim. Jim then asked the girl if she knew her phone number. The little girl said nothing and the bar tender was perplexed at the petrified look on the girls face. Jim the bartender then called the police and explained the situation.Once the girl was brought back to the police station it was learned that she had been missing for three months in a nearby county. The police then return to the bar to find that the owner had multiple kidnapped little girls in a cage under the bar that only he and the kidnapped girls knew about before the cops and Jim the bartender discovered it. The police then arrested The owner of the bar. He stood trial and was senteced to death row, he remains there today.

knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

What's long and black? A long and black object.

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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