-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

what did the apple say to the orange, nothing fruits can't talk

What did Shaggy say to Scooby before they got in the Mystery Machine? Scooby, get in the Mystery Machine.

what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

Why is Skrillex bad at fishing? Because he always increases the treble input in his songs, and he doesnt have a rod.

What is the difference between England and yogurt? One is a Western-European country and the other is a dairy product.

Three men walked into a bar. The fourth one ducked.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no sense And it doesn't rhyme either

whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

Do I ever ask yo a question that I havn't given you the answer to Mr Hearty.

Roses are Blue Violets are Red I have Alsheimers... Cheese on Toast

why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

The awkward moment when you find your wife on the online dating site you are on.

What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

The First National Tree Bank just closed down. Don't worry it started a brand new branch.

What name do you call a woman who is pregnant? Her first name.

Q: Knock knock Q: Who's there? A: Not Suzie

Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are white And Pansies hold hands and skip

why did the small boy drop his ice cream ? because he has no hands

Detroit has a low crime rate

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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