- Anti Joke

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

If Justin Bieber and Rebecca Black had a baby, would it be a boy or a girl? It's a fifty-fifty shot.

What do you call a Middle Eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

What did red say to yellow? Move over orange is coming now.

what falls from the sky, is white, and can kill you a refrigerator

What do you get if you mix rice with slightly different flavoured rice? Rice.

Why did the man think he was hungry? Answer: Because his brain told that he needed to Eat or he was going to be really hungry. Made by eli

The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it was tree

Why couldn't tom concentrate on his homework? Because he was a loaf of bread.

If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud.

An Irishman, a German, a Jew, and a Mexican walk into a bar...... the Irishman is named designated driver and all four have a safe and enjoyable evening.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Two chemist walk into a bar. The Bartender ask them what they want. The first chemist says he wants H20. The second chemist laughs and says he wants H20 too. Then he dies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

13 =B you just learned something

what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

Ask me if I want an orange. Do you want an orange? No.

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.