What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

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what did the black women name her child jamaal

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What's the difference between my mom, and a bag of garbage? A bag of garbage is incapable of contracting aids

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What did the the man, the dog, and the psychiatrist talk about? The man's childhood experience losing his pet as a contributer to his symptoms of psychosis.

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A man walked into a bar. He was only 19, but technically a man. Underage drinking is not O.K.

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Have you ever been to Uranus? Well I heard it's nice this time of year.

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Why didn't Suzie ride her bike? Suzie's mother aborded her. She was never born.

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What happens when you mix breed a cat and a human?? .. you get arrested and get raped by your fellow prisoners DONT do it!

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Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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Santa and smart blond jump off a building who lands frost none nethither exist

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road ? A. Because he had grown tired of living thus choosing to end his life.

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Why can't you fit 100 oranges in a bathtub? Because motorcycles don't have doors

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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Two reporters walk into Tah rir Square. Both are abused and that's sad.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

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Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The Gestapo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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