How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

What did Helen Keller say to the priest? Nothing, she didn't know he was there.

Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

What's worse than a paper cut? 2 paper cuts.

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

roses are red violets are red? trees are red!? who the hell cut themselves?

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

An Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman walked into a bar. The Englishman ordered a lager, the Irishman ordered a Guiness, and the Scotsman ordered tap water.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because ti was stapled to the chicken.

There are 3 types of people, those that can count and those who can not.

Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

A chicken walked into the bar...

Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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