A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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Charlie Sheen

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Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

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When the world ends what would be the death toll It would be unknown since every one would be around to calculate it

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Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Why Did Suzie fall of the swing? She has Polio and will die the Next Day

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why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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How many Mexicans eating a Taco in California does it take to fix a lightbulb? 1

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten Jew flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --Amon Goeth

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******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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a little kid goes as candle for halloween, 69 girls blew him teenage boy goes as candle for halloween, all he got was burned

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

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A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

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What's black and doesn't work? Half of Detroit.

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Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops