Q: What did the two muffins say in the oven? A: OMG we are in an oven, "OMG a talking muffin"

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

thumb_up thumb_down -8

They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet, Who gives a shit

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's sad about a dog and it's owner dying in a car accident? They were on their way to the vet.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An Irish man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and notices he has a steering wheel stuck down the front of his pants. "Hey," he says, "What's with the steering wheel down your pants?" The Irish man looks down at it, dumbfounded. "I have absolutely no idea," he says, and removes it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

an ethopian thanksgiving

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is a hammer? It's not a screwdriver

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why were you at a funeral? Someone died.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

A horse walks into a bar and orders a double whiskey. The bar man says "what's with the long face"? The horse replies "My wife left me, took the kids with her, took everything, I'm devastated"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happens when your read this? you don't laugh

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What KFC? Deep fried aborted babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops