Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

Why did the boy bring a ladder to school? Perhaps he was doing a project on tree-life.

So there we were, climbing Mount Kjerag and we take a break. So I decided to tell you a joke. "Isn't this nice, just hanging around? See it's funny because we're suspended over 1000 metres in the air by our harnesses, except that you're not because I cut yours and now you're falling and you're gonna die." But I had done all that before I told you the joke so you didn't hear me and now I'll have to cut my harness and try to catch up to you so I can repeat myself. Great job, ya prick.

patty was in sunday school, the teacher asked her "patty who created the universe?" john sliped into the seat next to her and jabbed her with a pen "LORD ALMIGHTY" the teacher said' good patty now who gave himself for us? john again jabbed her with a pin "JESUS CHRIST" "that very good patty now what did mary say to joseph after they had their 23 child?" john jabbed her " IF YOU STICK THAT DAMN THING IN ME ONE MORE TIME ILL BREAK IT IN HALF!!!" the teacher fainted

Yo momma's so stupid, she got a moderately low score on her SATs, and sadly, was not excepted by any colleges she applied to, and never got a job. This is why she became depressed, and resorted to suicide to escape the growing pain.

I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

My, you you... SEDUCER! XD, and there I go proving your point by going uppercase XD

Who do you call when there is a ghost in your house? You should problably call the doctor, you may be hallucinating.

A priest a rabbi and the dalai lama walk into a bar. They decided to order the hotwings...... Why do u care??? : )

How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb? NONE A YO F******G BUSINESS!!!

Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

A priest, a minister, and a rabbi walk into a butcher's shop. The priest and the minister each by a pound of pork while the rabbi doesn't because one of the 613 Commandments is that a Jew shall not eat any animal with hooves.

Two Mice are sitting on a bridge , one falls down an the other is named Charlotte

God saw himself. Finally, proof.

How many amish people does it take to screw in a light blub? None as the amish don't require artificial light

Why couldnt the man buy food? Because.

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

You should put some sand in your vagina to make the crabs feel more at home.

What did the mentally challenged kid get on his test? Drool

Why are asians such bad drivers? Cause they constantly have their eyes closed.

Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

knock, knock who's there? boo boo who? sorry i dont know anyone named boohoo so get the hell off my lawn

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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