What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

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A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

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Your girlfriend.

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After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

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Whats big, round and orange? A big round orange

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What did the helicopter say? Aluminum-minum-minum-minum-minum-mum-mum-mum-mum-um-um-um-um

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The duck walked up to the lemonade stand and he said to the man who was running the stand, hey I cancer CC

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a man walks into a bar with a monkey i forgot the rest of the joke your moms a whore

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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I love animals . But the ASPCA soon put a stop to that .

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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Why did the soccer player miss practice? He got shot in the face.

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

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Why couldnt Helen Keller drive? Because She was Blind you sexist asshole

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What is black and white and red all over? I don't know. I was hoping you did.

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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Why did the fat guy survive the the plane crash? He was late to get up due to a malfunctioning alarm clock and so missed his flight, sparing him of the tragic outcome the other passengers suffered. To this day he still thinks about how a completely random occurrence saved his life.

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WTF THINKING: "If you are going trough hell go back to where the path to hell began just get the fuck out of there you stupid dumbass muddaf0cker" "If you feel life is pushing you five steps back for each one you go forward, just turn your fucking back to your goal and you will get there in no time" "Never ever ever ever ever give up" -Fucking inspiring when you just give up after a certain number of "evers" "IT IS BETTER TO REIGN IN HEAVEN THAN TO SERVE IN HEAVEN!" "I forgot the rest" Nero the ONLY moralman (Fuck Neronism and they copying my shit, I am the only psychopath animal theRAPIST in town! (Female animals only, you think I am a pervert or something? Be ashamed you perverted deviant!)

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Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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why is 6 afraid of 7 because seven is black

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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