:)I will always assist you in whatever you ever want. :(I want to kill you!

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What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: She was going to speek at a PETA meeting about the cruel conditions of chicken farms. I hit her with my car

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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Not even I believe you will ever know yourself that well ever Nero, you see what you created as a false illusion, as all of your, or rather our effort for nothing, as a pathetic attempt to create heaven on earth. In my eyes, you succeeded in doing so, and if it where for you, or more people such as yourself and I, it would have lasted, stop trying to give people what they do not deserve, and remember that making others happy will never cure the sadness and pain deep within you, only cover it. Stop fleeing from yourself, stay, get to know yourself.

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What is black and white and has 4 wheels? A zebra, I lied about the wheels

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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My name is Dave I like poems Microwave ummmmmmmmm (enter word that rhymes with poems)

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A man walks to a baseball game what does he see? Many people

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Why did the chicken cro- Oh. He got run over.

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What's green and looks like a forest? A forest.

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Why was Billy's grandma not around for Thanksgiving? Because she's dead

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Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

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How many policemen does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they just beat up the room for being black

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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dad said he had to drop the kids off at the pool what does that mean mom? honey it means dad has to take a shit beacuase shit looks like retarded black kids with down sydrome

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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