Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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Poop

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because he's human.

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

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One walrus says to the other, "Why are you shaking like that?" The other walrus says, " I've been addicted to ectasy for three years. It's ruining my life."

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

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Hi... your father has testicular cancer and he will die in 2 months....

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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Q: How much old could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck Wood A:10.6 cubic metes

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Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a women.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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What did the blind, deaf, retarded kid get for Christmas? Spoiled.

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whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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What do you call a black man that has a family with a white woman? A good husband and father who had a stable job in a not so stable economy. The current issues of inflation has made it hard for him, but his dedication pays his bills and feeds his family. He later will die a sad death caused by prostate cancer at the age of 47.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms Why couldnt he get up? He had no legs What did the boy get for Christmas? Cancer What did the boy get for Easter? A funeral Knock, knock Who's there? Not the boy.

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they told me not to write here but i did

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Why did the Jewish man leaves a coffee shop without leaving a tip? He was homeless and spent his last cents on the coffee.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops