Why couldn't the girl talk... she chocked to death -Alan Davis

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To meet up with its grandmother who just happened to live on the other side of the road because the doctor had said this could possibly be her last week.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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You know you guys are suppose to post jokes, not basketball comments.

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Vegeta, What does the scouter say about his power level? It's Over 9000!!!!!

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Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? one is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and one is a watermelon

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It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken

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A man walks into a bar. Ow

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A black man is seen next to a dead man. Who do you call? The ambulance.

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penis. nuff said.

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How do you make a grown man cry? Fling a rubber band at him.

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(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

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Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

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Roes are red Violets are blue I have a potato Let's make pie

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I AM YOUR SALVATION! And you are my poopstain

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops