How does an Asian person get overweight? By eating food with a great amount of calories and not burning then off in time.

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"What's your name?" "Josephine." "Josephine?" "No, Josephine." "That's what I said." "I know,"

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What do black people and bananas have in common? 50% of their DNA

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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Why would a baby cry? Because it's being put through a juicer.

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The joke below me was written by someone who was mauled by a panther and raped by a tribe.

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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Roses are red Violets are Blue Let's just screw

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Your face Godammit!!!

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Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

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What's the difference between humans and dogs? 4.

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Q: What is scarier than the boogie man? A: Herpes

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Now on breaking news!: Man found hanged upside down in a forest with 403 lethal knife-stabs in his back! Policeman: "We have concluded this is indeed the worst case of suicide ever"

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Whats worse than a suicide bomber? Hubcaps

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A blonde walks into a bar. She enjoys a refreshing, cold beverage with friends before returning home to sleep ahead of another day of hard work as a scientist.

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I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

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Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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European on my shoes, buddy.

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What's red and invisible? No tomatoes.

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whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing your mum having sex

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When life gives you gators, make Gatorade.

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Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I'm colorblind.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops