Q: what's white on the top and black on the bottom? A: Society

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Whats worse to see 100 dead babies on the bed of a truck or 100 fake babies falling directly from the empire state building... I don't know I have never seen either but if you could tell me if you saw it maybe i can use my imaination!!!

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

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There were three brothers. Big, Harry and Dick. They were walking along the road and were all instantly killed by a drunk driver. Their names were never mentioned and their story was used as a promotion for the seriousness of drunk driving and should not be taken lightly.

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What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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What do polar bears have that no other animal has? Polar bear babies.

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Man I just flew in from Pittsburgh...Boy are the people ugly.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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What's worse than reading a bad joke Realizing it's yours.

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Bark I'm a tree

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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What's the funniest part of a tomato? The skin.

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Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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A horse walks in to a bar. The bartender calls animal control.

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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What starts with E and ends with lephant? Not giraffe

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

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Roses are red, my binoculars are blue. When your window's open, i'm watching you.

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender then asks him "Why the long face?" The horse then gives the bartender an unwilling look as he walks to the other side of the bar where several people leave due to potential danger in the situation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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