why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Road Kill Penguins.

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Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, he is very fond of animals and would never want to shoot them.

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what did one wall say to the other wall Nothing because its physically impossible for walls to talk

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Too tired to come up with the definition, by the way, it was I that came up with the code system you guys use, so I kinda knew long ago that you lied to me when you said you do not use passwords,

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I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

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What do your mum and dad have in common Not much your dads dead

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because the branch broke.

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how many cucumbers dos it take to change a light bulb? none. cucumbers cant change light bulbs. dumbass.

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How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

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Q:What business did the black man break into? A: The business of show, because he was a talented actor.

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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save me from the nothing ive become

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

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What is blue and angry? Mr Johnston wearing his green dress. I'm colour blind but he came round to my way of thinking in the end.

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Whats better then a guard llama two Guard llamas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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